It's MINE...all MINE

Remember that feeling I had when I bought my house almost a year ago?

Whoa.  A year ago.  I can't believe I've been in MY OWN house for a year.  It's crazy how fast time flies by.

I have a new mine now, well, it was mine a year ago too, but NOW IT'S LEGAL. YO.

I got to work yesterday, the computers were down.  Since there was no facebook work gonna happen, I took off for the emissions testing place to have my van tested.

(It passed, yay)

I took my emissions paper, my folder of documents and high tailed it over to the DMV.  I strolled right in and was helped immediately.  Good feeling.

The Mom Mobile is NOW legally, or paper-wise, mine now. 

(I searched minivan and got this...*perplexed look*)



So I sat down at the computer with the lovely DMV (no sarcasm she really was a lovely lady) handed over all my documents.  POOF.  New plate, in my name.  Title now in the mail, in my name.  New license, in my same name but with my "new" (year old) address.  It's all like official or something now.

It feels damn good too.  What I have now, is all mine.  MINE MINE MINE.  My house, my van, my plates, my LIFE.

*Does a little dance*

Yes, with all this MINE stuff there are struggles, but so far...this year "on our own" has been quite successful and I can truly say that I am the happiest I've been in a very, *cough* very long time.

Less than 5 minutes away long distance relationship...

Could that title BE any longer?

(twss)

A few weeks ago Mr.FF asked me if I had ever been in a long distance relationship.

"HELL no!" I quickly replied.

Truth is, now that I think about it. Yes. Yes I was.

My freshman year of college, I went off still dating my first love and boyfriend from high school. I was a few hours away at college and he was here attending college.

I don't consider that, though, a substantial "long distance relationship" for many reasons. The number one reason, it was college yo. It was party time, Holmes. Needless to say, he and I both moved on and broke off that "long distance relationship."

I don't even remember how long it lasted after I had moved to school.

(It might have lasted a few beers in, just sayin)

Regardless, my initial response to any long distance relationship is HELLZ TO THE NO.

After the panic settled and it was confirmed that he wasn't moving away...I wondered why he would ask.

"When in a long distance relationship," he started, "little things matter the most. Like the phone calls at night, the text, the extra effort that one puts into any amount of time to get together."

Confused I just mumbled out a "MMMK? You're point?"

"When you feel like you aren't giving me enough, know that you are. We may not see each other as often as we like, but you always call, you always send cute little text, and when you can you make spare moments to see me."

(That might be paraphrased a little, but you get the gist.)

((If you aren't getting the gist...let me help...um, he thinks I'm awesome. You're welcome.))

Anyway...this weekend we were both suppose to NOT have kids, Capt'n Cancel's typical work schedule has him working on Friday nights. So I have my kids til tomorrow afternoon. Mr.FF's ex has a "work conference" in Indy...so he has his kids all weekend.

It feels like it's been forever since we've had alone time, but that is the way it goes. I couldn't imagine anyone other than the two of us understanding each other's situations any better...not only are we a match, but I'm thinking our Exes are too.

*kicks dirt*

Hope you all have a lovely weekend, not matter what you do, I am sure we will too.

Trippin

Down memory lane, yo. I don't do drugs. Unless Mr.FF is a drug, then I'd do him.


oh whoa...moving on.

ONE YEAR AGO.

It was one year ago that I was squealing on this here blog. So excited, so ready to move on, SO READY to have that hangnail, so lovingly renamed by Vicki as a HEMORRHOID. Ex#2 (Capt'n Cancel) removing himself from the family home.

Don't know what I'm talking about?

Here, here is the link.

My Pig Squeals heard around the bloggyland.

Even crazier...is the post a year before that...I'm surprised to remember we were separated at that point in time as well...hmmm.

Oh the time. Oh the pain. Oh the disappointment. Oh the shoulda/couldas that went through my head on a daily basis.

I went through the motions, the counseling, the struggles, but it was just that...motions...knowing the whole time how it was going to end. It was so difficult for me to stand up for what I knew to be true and what I felt best for all parties involved....BUT I DID. FINALLY.

I am not proud of any part of that short marriage and I am even embarrassed for the decisions I made before and during it. There aren't many regrets that I have in my life, marrying that man is one regret.

Like my Mom says, though, at least I didn't waste 25 years of my life.

True dat Momma. TRUE DAT.

Sometimes, when I feel whiney about my life I just have to look back at how it use to be and let me tell you...those reminders are all I need to know that where I am RIGHT NOW...is exactly where I'm suppose to be. The hope and dream that there was more out there for me, wasn't just a dream...IT'S HERE...AND I'M LIVING IT.

Things people will say hidden behind anonymity.

Friday night I get home from work with the kids. I run over to the mailbox in the rain and pull out the mail.

Junk mail as usual, except for on envelope addressed to "Stacie", no last name, no return address.

That's strange I thought.

I carry all of our stuff inside, overly curious about who has sent me mail. I put down the armloads of backpacks and tear open the envelope.

The handwriting is not familiar, I unfold the brown construction like paper and start to read.

What are you teaching your children by jumping from man to man so quickly?

My heart jumps into my throat.

There are certain things they shouldn't see or know about. Your daughter will grow up to have multiple failed marriages and your son will grow up thinking his mother was a whore.

I stand there, stunned. I sat the letter down and walk away, my hands trembling, tears building up in my eyes. I take a deep breath, my mind racing as to WHO could have sent this. WHO knows where I live, who is THIS invested in my life, WHO would care so deeply to send this yet not sign their name?

The WHO doesn't really matter, I guess. What I'd like to say to this person is the following.

What I am teaching my children is how to pick themselves up, even when the choices they've made in their lives cause pain to themselves or others, life goes on. We all make mistakes, it's how we handle those mistakes that defines us.

What I am teaching my children with this new relationship, though you might think too soon, is what a loving relationship looks like, what a responsible man looks like and that if you love someone you respect them, you do nice things for them. Love DOESN'T look like the relationship they've seen and known for their years of life.

As far as my daughter's future marital bliss or otherwise, when she is an adult and her and I have a conversation about the mistakes I've made, things I wished were different, things I feel I've had no control over and things I've had control over, she will see and know that she also has choices. I will support my daughter in any of her endeavors whether they work out or not, I will support her decisions. I will support her through the celebrations and the hard times. To predict her failure is premature.

My son's opinion of me as he grows will not be, "my mom is a whore or even WAS a whore"- the definition of whore according to the dictionary is "a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute;" and though by YOUR standards I've moved on quickly I have not, nor have I ever been paid money for sexual intercourse. So your theory on that is irrelevant.

What I am teaching my son is that there are men out there that live up to their word, that don't have to go through life with an alcoholic drink in their hand. What I am teaching my son is that there are other ways to be as a man, no one will replace his father, but there can be GOOD male role models in his life and right now I have full control over who those role models will be on our side of life.

What I am teaching my children is to be kind to others, to speak nicely of others, to respect other's opinions even if they don't agree, and to be happy children who grow into happy adults, despite what they have gone through in their lives. What I am teaching them is that being a bitter unhappy person is a choice, not a lifestyle.

So though I thank you for your concern and respect that everyone has an opinion, until you are living in my shoes, until you see what I do or not do according to your standards then you have no right to judge and do so so cowardly. If you have legitimate concern for my children's well being, please come to me as an adult, until then get a life of your own and stay out of mine.


Found this quote that I thought fitting:

"We cannot control the evil tongues of others; but a good life enables us to disregard them." -Cato the Elder

Dear Mom,

What I'd hoped was to see you more at ease.

What I'd hoped was to see you more comfortable in your own skin.

What I'd hoped was to see a refreshed look in your eyes.

Yet when I saw you, the hope washed away.

Your struggle with your decisions clearly still creasing your forehead. Your eyes still sting with resentment, hurt and fear. Your heart still wildly beats out of your chest at the mention of the past twenty five years. Your balance on your own two feet is that of a newborn folly.

I won't pretend that I know how it feels, or that I could or would handle things any differently than you have. I wish you peace, I wish you love and I wish you to find who you are and come back to us.

What divorce means to me....

it means:
I don't have to hang out with you anymore and pretend to listen to you.
I don't have to hang out with you anymore and pretend to like you
I don't have to hang out with you anymore and pretend to care.

I DON'T HAVE TO HANG OUT WITH YOU ANYMORE. PERIOD.

what this means for you:
STOP calling to "chat"
Stop coming in to "tuck the kids in for bed" and then CONTINUING TO HANG AROUND AFTER YOU'VE tucked said kids into bed.
Stop inviting yourself into what were once family activities that you were never that interested in participating in while we were married.
-------------------

Ex#2 has backed off somewhat, but I had to blow up and tell him to BACK OFF. One weekend that he had the kids, he called me every single day and even twice on one day. I didn't answer any of the calls. If it were important he'd leave a message.

It's so intrusive. It's so aggravating.

Anyway, as I said, he has backed off for the most part.

Holidays are approaching.

The schedule for Christmas is this: Buggy will be with her father Christmas Eve, Bubba will be with his father for Christmas Eve. Both children are to come HOME Christmas morning around 9ish. THEN IT IS MY TIME WITH THEM. MINE.

Ex#2 (seriously, shoot me if I ever suggest, hint or even entertain the idea of remarrying) whines the other day on the phone that he doesn't have anything to do after he drops off Bubba.

*silence on my part*

He continues on that maybe he could hang around while the kids open their gifts from Santa.

*silence on my part*

*deep breath*

THEN he says that my Aunt....MY AUNT...invited him to Christmas at her house later that night.

FOR THE LOVE OF PETE.

He plays the poor me card so well that my (reiterate MY) family invites him.

Hi. We. are. divorced.

*deep breath*

So after lighting up a smoke, taking a deep inhale I finally spoke.

I said, if you are attending MY FAMILY'S Christmas later at my Aunt's then NO. You may not hang around my house Christmas morning.

We'll see how it all turns out.

Where the hell is his girlfriend to put an end to this madness? WHY CAN'T I PUT AN END TO THIS MADNESS?


_______

Just got an email from EX#2 asking me out for dinner...SERIOUSLY...what the hell?
It's not even funny anymore. For real.

oh THE big D.

So as I quickly mentioned on Tuesday, I'm divorced.

It was all so surreal. Kinda like when I went into labor with the kids, I stood with amniotic fluid running down my legs (tmi?), in denial that I was ACTUALLY in labor.

STBE = Ex#2 now.

We were getting really annoyed with the lack of progress. We discussed the terms, decided to just friggin agree and get it over with. He told his lawyer, she wrote it up, sent it to my lawyer. My lawyer called me, had me run in and sign and THEN GET THIS...

SHE HAD ME RUN THEM TO THE COURTHOUSE MYSELF.

I know, take a minute, let that sink in.

I'll wait.

*taps fingers on desk*

Here's why, it'd save me money and guarantee they were taken/stamped in a timely manner...cause the over $3000 she already sucked out of me was her limit apparently on sucking.

*ahem*

Ex#2 decides he wants to go along for this joy ride, so I used the time to bitch and moan nicely point out, had he not been such a jackass this whole thing could have been done MONTHS ago, with probably ONE lawyer, not TWO fucking lawyers doing close to nothing for $3000 each.

*stands back up from being bent over and abused*

Nonetheless, we trudged up the five flights to the judge's office, where the assistant (secretary?) rifled through the papers, got out her nifty judge's stamp and declared us DIVORCED.

Just like that.

Judge not necessary, just her signature stamp.

Ex#2 looked at me, looked at the assistant and said, "that's it?" he turns to me, "Can't change your mind now."

Without laughing in his face, cause I'm not THAT bitchy, I said, "Sorry, I'm not going to change my mind."

Really, it is sad. But I KNOW it's the best decision for me and the kids. I've been trying to make this decision for years...and now it's done. All that agonizing, all that drama, all the tears, the hurt, and some of the good times...with one judges' stamp they are over in theory.



I am not proud of decisions I made during this marriage or before it, but I am proud of myself for finally making the decision to get out.

I'm back, but I'm not back.

Bullet points of how my last five days have gone....

ready?
set.
go!

- I am OFFICIALLY divorced.
- I am OFFICIALLY DIVORCED (that one is huge, worth repeating)
- I am officially moved out of our "old" house.
- I am officially crammed in a room with the kids, holy hell.
- I am officially on countdown until I can close on my "new" house.
- I am officially NOT a DOG owner.
- I am officially exhausted.
- I am officially swamped at work...so bare with me.

Totally Ticks me Off Tuesday

So this is where I usually go OFF about something that ticks me off, but this weekend was so fantabulous that I can't for the life of me fathom anything ticking me off.

EXCEPT.

It's really not ticking me off as much as it just made me sad.

Bubba and Buggy came home last night from STBE's. They always come home with all kinds of things he's bought them (which actually DOES tick me off, cause ya can't buy love, but he sure tries).

Anyway, my point. The kids were exhausted. Weepy...defiant but in a we're too tired to even debate it but we aren't going to give in easily either kind of way.

As I was getting them to bed, Bubba lost his mind. Sobbing. Missing his dad. Through the tears he said, "I didn't think that selling the house meant that daddy would not live with us."

As much as I try to explain that daddy and mommy getting a divorce means that they don't live together anymore, he just cried and held onto my neck so tightly.

When STBE moved out back in March (?) the kids were so kosher with it, they seemed unscathed. I chalked it up to STBE not being around that much anyway, 85% of the activities were with me. It didn't feel like much of a change around the house, a little quieter, but not much felt like it had changed for them.

I think it has now hit Bubba. I am sure that being tired didn't help, but it's been more than just last night. His daycare called this week as well, letting me know that he's been very emotional and defiant towards the teachers.

It breaks my heart. After I shed some tears about it, I get ticked at myself. How could I have messed up their lives like this? I know that getting a divorce is what is best for me in the long run and ultimately best for them, but dangit. It sucks to see Bubs hurt like this. I tears me in two.

I know it's useless to get ticked about the what ifs and the mistakes I've made, but sometimes it does suck me down. I stood on the deck crying, smoking and reaffirming to myself (and the universe) that I'm doing the right thing. It will all work out and we will be OK. I know that it's true, it's just getting over these little hills unscathed that is the impossible.


Click the button to check out Mommy from the Midwest and other participating in Totally Ticks me off Tuesday

Totally Ticks me Off Tuesday.

Click the button to check out Mommy from the Midwest and other participating in Totally Ticks me off Tuesday

There are so many ugly things going on with this divorce, that my TTMOT just sounds like a broken record. Skipping on the same subject.

STBE = TOOL.
He.
is.
a.
tool.

With the house *almost* sold, if this divorce isn't finalized our proceeds *might* be frozen until the divorce IS finalized.

*fuck*

I didn't agree to everything he and his lawyer proposed.

My lawyer and I made changes, sent it back.

He and his lawyer made MORE changes...we haven't received it yet.

Except NOW with the pending sale, STBE is back to the "threats" financially if I don't agree to his new proposed changes.

I am so sick and tired, tired and sick, of dealing with his money hungry greediness.

*bangs head on record player
*skip-skip-skip*

TOOL. TOOL. TOOL. TOOL.

She's super freaky.

As in freaked out.

In random form:

-offer coming in for house tonight!
-realtor says it's complicated
-STBE is "too busy" tonight to entertain the offer -- WTF?
-STBE wants realtor to work around HIS schedule

-Adjuster is here looking at the damage to my van from the accident that I "wasn't" in on Sunday
-I have a $500 deductible. *sigh*

-Called bank to get myself in for preapproval to buy my own house
-I have an appointment Monday morning.
-He says we might have a snag because the divorce is not final
-Reiterate, filed in Oct 08 it is NOW FING JULY 09

*DEEP BREATH*
Everything will work out, cause it has to right? right. RIGHT!

Putting this out to the universe now. Please let this all work out, please let me find a perfectly cheap house, let me not get into any more trouble with this vehicle.

Amen.

Turmoil

I get tired of hearing myself rant about the "soon to be ex" (STBE). Yet, I keep allowing him to come into our lives and cause me such turmoil. I don't know how to stop it from affecting me.

I do know that I need to step away and get him away from me personally as much as possible, but it's difficult when I am living in our home (while it's on the market) and while he is still involved in getting the children to their destinations (practices, games, etc)

Last night I had an engagement that I had to attend to; after finding out my Mom would not be able to babysit, I asked STBE. He hem hawed around, muttering he had laundry he needed to do and 10 hour shifts at work, yada yada. As he went on, I just remained silent. After he took a breath, I asked, "would you be able to help out or not?"

He did. He watched the kids at our home. When I arrived home, I found he was doing his laundry that he brought with him.

In his words, he was doing ME a favor by sitting with the kids, why did it matter if he did his laundry or not.

Doing ME a favor? (I am not quite sure how I kept it together and didn't go psycho right at this point)

I replied with a smile on my face, "You shouldn't think of it as doing me a favor, but that you got to spend a few extra hours with the kids."

Sure it was condescending, hearing any FATHER say they had to babysit, infuriates me. Besides the fact that he could have just said no if he had too much to do; I would have moved on and found someone to help me out.

Of course, my comment sends him into a tirade about how I am NOT doing this, and I am NOT doing that. Knocking me down about any little thing that I might not be doing around the house. IE; not putting enough salt in the water softener, cleaning out the gutters, etc.

The thing is, as ridiculous as his tirades are, I can blow him off on the outside, but the inside is fuming. It is outraged, it is ready to battle war. THAT is what I want to change.

I want my inside to match my outside actions of letting it roll off my back.


*sidenote, how cute is that graphic? I want to redo my blog with her in my header, cause I totally look like that.

Does it have to be said?

This is for family members or soon to be ex family members..."friends" who might be reading this blog and reporting back to soon to be ex-hubby.

If you misconstrued this post as me "complaining" about being a single mother, you are WRONG.

Though complaining is one of my finer tuned techniques, the fact that I am a single mother BY CHOICE is not a complaint of mine.

It's crazy, hectic and SOMETIMES overwhelming, but if you KNOW ME...and I mean really know me, that is how I prefer my life.

I can say that I am MUCH happier at this point and will continue to expound my happiness as time goes by...as any mother knows a happy mommy equals happy children.

When the kids are not with me I don't know who I am or what to do with myself. I have to PHYSICALLY force myself to leave the couch and shower...I do know that it will get easier and more routine as time moves forward.

Therefore, if you don't know me or think you know me through a venting blog, you have NO idea...and don't know the half of me...hell not even a quarter of me and what I am about.

You asked...

Let the celebration begin?
Ha.

Yeah. Last night was my FIRST night of "freedom"...just because Hubby "moved out" doesn't mean I am "free" by any means.

I got home from work and hubby was STILL here. *sigh*

He putzed and putzed around.

He only packed HALF of his clothes (he's moving to his mom's so he isn't taking furniture).

He asked if he could come over today (Saturday) to play catch with the kids (?!?!)

He asked if he could come over Sunday morning to watch the kids with their Easter baskets.

I just looked at him and said, "so when is it that you WON'T be here?"

I know it is difficult, I am sure he is having a hard time, but COME ON...FOR THE LOVE OF PETE.

I made a schedule, he has the kids next weekend...so maybe then...maybe then I will have some "freedom" feeling. I am skeptical, however, I think he is going to linger around here.

I can't get a clean break. I know these things are usually messy, but I was hoping for a break nonetheless. Eventually, I hope.

SO basically NIGHT ONE of OPERATION DIVORCE and SINGLE MOMMYHOOD - Anti climatic.

Sign of Trouble?

Sign of trouble

For Sale sign in front of your house.

Neighbors are curiously working in their yards (or maybe it's the nicer weather) peering over their shoulders towards our house.

"Foreclosure?" They whisper.

Eyes darting our direction quickly diverted when they meet mine.

DIVORCE!!! I wish I could YELL loud enough for the whole nosey ass neighborhood.

Sign of trouble

The phone rang the other night, I was standing fairly close because we had had 2 hang ups right before this call.

"HELLO?" I say in my most annoyed normal voice.

Pause.

*deep sigh*

"HELLO?" I ask a little louder.

"Um, Hi, Yes. Is this Stacie's Madness?"

"yes."

"Do you live at ?" the voices asks.

"Depends, what may I help you with?" I asked now fully paranoid.

"We are trying to reach Ms. Nosey Neighbor. Can you please run over to her house and leave her a message for us? Her phone seems to be disconnected." They plead.

"Um, no thanks not interested." Click.

Really? No. I won't. Their phone is probably disconnected BECAUSE OF YOU, I am not going to walk my ass across the street and do your dirty work. THANKYOUVERYMUCH.

Bet their house will be on the market next week.




*************************

Happy Good Friday, hope you all have a WONDERFUL Easter Weekend. Thank you for visiting my blog and leaving me so many awesome comments. You all rock! For.real!

*Twirl Twirl*

I've got nothing for ya today.

I am still reeling over this new "move" on Friday. I am besides myself with excitement. What will I do first???

Who knows? But it will be for me and not for anyone else.

There will be no more tippy-toeing around someone else to keep the peace.

There will be no more forced "family dinners".

The air will be tension free.

I mean, I just can't stop smiling.

I will roll around in the freedom, dance in the peace and throw my hands up in praise.

Rocking even more...I only work 1/2 day on Friday...so let the fun begin early!!

It's Tuesday?

*edit....this post is so giddy and fluffy that it is grammatically out of my control...just as the squealing is that my coworkers are experiencing every few mintues from the direction of my office *squeal*

um, so since none of that stuff happened to me in my Not Me Monday post. I feel pretty darn good today, not sore at all...or bruised...or (attempting) to walk around with two left feet, while the right one went on vacation.

Oh if all of that was true, I would be ON vacation with that foot, therefore, it wasn't me, didn't happen to me...

*right foot if you are reading this, bring back a Pina Colata for me, K thanks*

***
Happy 23RD birthday to my baby sister! 23! Wow. Seems like it was just yesterday I was 23. Oh, yes, that's right, it WAS just yesterday.

*quickly moves on*

My lovely sister, now 23 is FREAKING THE HELL out. She feels like she "should be" something by this age, she doesn't know WHAT...but SOMETHING. Married or thinking of marriage, done with college or MAYBE attending college. SOMETHING. So she is struggling.

I thought back to (yesterday) when I was 23, I was in all those places that she "thinks" she should be in and look at me now, (few years later) on my second divorce. (I do have a degree, but didn't get that before kids).

Anyway. Just thought it was fun to think (a few years) back to where I was at that age. It is all about me ya know.

***
More about me...

I am giddy today. I (almost) feel guilty for feeling so giddy.

We had a showing on our house on Sunday, they liked the house, but were turned off by the loudness of the trains that go by. The tracks aren't even that close to our house! if you knew our area, you would chuckle with me and wish them luck finding a home that DOESN'T hear the trains.

Even this DENY! of our house doesn't take away my giddy feeling.

Here's why I am giddy:


1) Finally got a meeting with my lawyer scheduled. She better not cancel or I'm gonna have to smack a bitch!

2) I have court on another issue, so that will be filed in the DONE pile. Sweet.

3) Kids are starting the t-ball and softball schedules.

4) (save the best for last) Hubby, soon to be ex, informed me THIS MORNING he is moving out on FRIDAY *squeal*

***

April is turning out to be the BEST.FING.MONTH.EVER and it's only the 7Th day. NOW if Mother Nature would turn off the snow for our area...that would be SWELL and so on my "life is moving along" list.

****

Obviously, I type run ons when I am giddy, but I don't care, I am not changing them *squeal*...too giddy to care.

*Sing it with me*

I feel pissy
Oh so pissy.

In random list and order.

1) Still no F*&^*(^& call from my lawyer...

2) Hubby heard from HIS lawyer with what appears to be child support amounts. To which he replied, "I'm getting screwed" when he should say "whatever it takes to help support my child"

*deep breath*

3) Damn Aunt Flo makes her pending arrival hell for two weeks before she shows.

4) The refried black beans I am having for lunch clogged the sink and will later clog the...well you know.

5) Snow is in the forecast...AGAIN. *Shakes fist at Midwest weather*

6) House has been on the market since Saturday...no calls. It hasn't been that long I know, but I thought for sure, out of curiosity, SOMEONE would call for a showing. Nada.

Things I'm not pissy about...

1) My mom made it home safely Wednesday night!

2) Bubba has his first (for this season) t-ball practice this weekend.

3) We are meeting with Buggy's softball team at pizza place (no cooking for me tonight)!

4) Today is Friday and I finished Eclipse last night so I have a fresh weekend to start Breaking Dawn.

5) Some of the tulip bulbs I planted last fall are finally starting to come up, still haven't seen daffodils but I'm hopeful.

6) I got a card in the mail from Gwen @ Everything I like Causes Cancer...and it will be great blog material, when I am feeling less pissy.


There! 6 things that are making me pissy and 6 things that are not making me pissy. It is so much harder to come up (that's what he said) with the non pissy items.

Hope you all have a non pissy weekend.
Stay Warm, it is SPRING after all *bewildered look*

It's official

Don't forget the Eden Fantasys giveaway, it ends Tuesday! Click here to enter.

Last night I worked my tail off, cleaning, decluttering and throwing things away.

At one point, hubby said, "sad that it takes THIS to get things done around here!"

If I had known that divorce and putting the house on the market would get his ass moving on putting trim up in the basement, I would have....well...ended things sooner. ;)

9 am this morning MR Miata Realtor arrived to photograph the house.

Buggy went to the window to check him out and I hear, "Nice car!"

*eye roll*

He did compliment how nice the house looked and took lots of pictures, so fingers crossed. We signed a 90 day contract with him and we will reevaluate after 90 days to see if we want to stick with him.

Hope you all are enjoying your weekend...oh and no snow as of yet (thank goodness)

Move the stick so I can shove the Miata up your...

*I* wanted the ball to be rolling.

Let me tell you, it's rolling...and it is on a steep ass hill.

Tuesday night a realtor came to evaluate our house.

I never realized how much I liked my house until someone comes in and turns their nose up to it. Little pompous ass.

I arrived home from work and did a quick once over the house picking things up, running a dust cloth over some areas, putting dishes away, hiding laundry that needed folding.

Just as I felt the house was PRESENTABLE, a little fucking Mazda Miata convertible pulled into the driveway. I might have grumbled and judged immediately, but that's how I rolled at the particular time. Mazda Miata. *eye roll*

Just as I imagined a short little man got out of the car and strolled up to the door. Ever hair was in place, his teeth (I'm a teeth person, it's the next best feature after the ass eyes) perfectly align and glistening, I immediately didn't like him.

He does his schpeal about the current market and his 25 years of experience in the business and blah blah blah, he's so wonderful, yada yada. Tells us what the range for our house should go for, explains that we will be competing with brand new homes in the same price range so that is working against us. Our house is over 30 years old, without any old school charm. It's just a house and not a new one.

When we purchased the house five years ago, it was HORRIBLE. Nasty carpet throughout, wallpaper (old dated wallpaper) in every room, it was run down. We ripped the carpet out to reveal hardwood floors, I was THRILLED. We tore down all wallpaper and painted in warm brown tones. I love the way my house looks, feels and shows. It isn't perfect, it isn't my dream house, but I have made it our home.

PR-Pompous Realtor, says, "well, you could get such and such for your home, but these floors...."

Oh no he didn't.

I asked what little things I could do to help the process move along quickly, a mistake.

"How do you feel about refinishing the floors?"
"I don't feel, I refuse to live in that kind of mess..."

He commented that he is the type of person that can come into any house and see the potential (was he just knocking my house AGAIN?) but that some people can't see past paint colors.

"How do you feel about repainting?"
"I don't feel, I will not repaint."

I think he got the idea. I work full time, I have two kids, I don't know how much longer hubby will living there to "help" out as if he is a real big help as it is...and I will not put MYSELF out, or my KIDS out of that time and money to get a few extra dollars. Call me stubborn, cause, well, I *am* stubborn.

His last suggestion was to declutter, depersonalize and empty out as much as possible.

FINE!

I will do what I can, that is all that I will do...

How many houses did I look at before purchasing this one that had hideous colors on the walls (which my colors are not...well maybe Buggy's room, but whatever, bubble gum pink is HOT), or reeked of animal piss...or whatever.

So there you have it, my weekend plans. Aren't you jealous? OH! AND we are expecting a snow storm. When it rains it....snows?!?!?

*now maybe that I've got my whine all, I will calm the hell down and do what I have to do.*

*slew of explicits*